It's been a while since I've written anything in my personal diary. The thing is personally things have been a bit of a struggle for me lately. I've had a very difficult time dealing with the transition to living life without my grandmama. She was the most important person in my life, and though her quality of life had declined significantly towards the end, there was something comforting in knowing that she was still there. The way her face lit up every time I walked into the room made me feel loved. The fact that she never forgot who I was while dealing with dementia made me feel special. I can remember on one occasion she kissed my hand, kept kissing it and wouldn't let go. It's been a year since she's been gone, and it hasn't gotten any easier, but I've made up in my mind that I need to live a life in her honor that she would be proud of. That brings me to this New Year-New Me post. It's a phrase we hear often during the New Years. People tend to bash others for proclaiming that with a new year there will be a new them. They try to convince people to not set new years resolutions because they won't stick to them anyway. They ridicule those who want to make some sort of change to better themselves. This is completely crazy to me. I understand that a lot of people start off with goals, and somewhere along the way life happens and those goals kind of go by the wayside. That is when true friends and family should be there for you to say hey, didn't you want to accomplish this that or the other? How's that going for you? How can I encourage you during this time? Last year was my first year not setting new years resolutions and it was one of the toughest, most unfocused years of my life. This year I decided to change that. I have set goals for myself, and I'm looking forward to crushing each one. I know the road won't be easy, but if I want to have a good future I must start to focus my life now. I've determined in my mind that 2017 will be great! I'm going to lose weight, I'm starting 2 businesses, I will travel, Spend more time with my family, work on my relationship with God, and buy my very first bike so I can finally learn to ride one (that's the only goal I've failed to accomplish in the past). Your prayers as I set off on this new journey are greatly appreciated.